Are you self-centred or selfish?

It’s easy to confuse these two terms, but they are as different from each other as chalk and cheese. While ‘selfish‘ suggests blatant disregard for another, ‘self centred’ simply implies a ‘greater’ focus on the self.  Nothing wrong with the latter, everything wrong with the former!

If you love yourself, focus on your life, without delving too much into other people’s affairs, it makes you self-centred and not selfish. And being that way is, to me, the blueprint for a good life. To quote author Neale Donald Walsch in his best-selling book ‘Conversations with God’, “blessed are the self-centred for they shall know God.”

So the next time you put yourself BEFORE another and not at the COST of another, and someone calls you ‘selfish’, direct them to the nearest dictionary. Or better still, give them the link to this blog ;)

Rohan

My time will come

Birds will stop in their flight,

Trees won't sway, in the still night,

It's not far away, I needn't run,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


The inner me isn't yet known,

In my present life, I'm all alone,

What other people like, isn't my concept of fun,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


I've often lost my soul to love,

My commitment is seen by the figure above,

Yet this time I've lost, others forces have won,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


When you love another, and you feel pure,

Where love is the ailment, and also the cure,

But your emotions are tangled, like hair in a bun,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


I'm misunderstood, from within I'm torn,

I can't love another, unless it's my clone,

In such violent chaos, I'll simply keep mum,

It's a matter of time, my time will come

The world of pornography – taking things 'lying down'?

Like almost every other bloke on the planet, I've indulged in the viewing of porn- the odd flick here and there. And admittedly, it was rather entertaining.

This might sound ludicrous, but my reason for viewing it was a tad different from many others. I always felt that the performers were attracted to each other, or at the very least, shared a level of healthy comfort. After all, making love is an art, and how can the process occur, without the involvement of abundant emotions?

My idealistic perceptions went bust when I watched a talk show recently, the topic being 'horrors of the adult film industry'. I was shocked to realize that many women are forced into the business, and girls as young as 18 are misled by promises of fame and glamour. Of course, a lot enter the industry by choice, but leaving it is often choiceless. Moreover, in some films, the kind of acts women are made to perform are positively ghastly and the ideas for such performances can only germinate in a mind that is seriously depraved. A particular film titled 'Deep throat' is regarded as an adult film classic. When one reads the story line on wikipedia , it appears that the actors would have had immense fun while shooting for it. However, many years after the movie's release, the lead actress said she was forced to perform those acts by her perverted husband and anyone who watches the film, is, in essence, seeing her get raped.

We all in our own ways support this industry. If there wasn't a demand, there wouldn't be any supply. The next time you find yourself watching an adult film or see it stored in someone's mobile phone, simply ask yourself: Does this really serve me? Am I so desperate?

Wait for the real act, whenever it comes into your life. In all probability, it'll have a great deal of love involved in it. Trust me, the feeling is much better...and cleaner.

Young India beckons us...are we listening?

It's been a while since I put up something on my blog, except for the poem on sleep - a result of my revisit to childhood.

Today, I saw a short documentary titled 'America: Down and Out'. It focussed on the increasing level of homelessness in America, a country which has long boasted of being 'the land of opportunities'. However, let alone opportunities, the land doesn't even let the homeless lay their bodies on it; instead, they are arrested for 'loitering'. And this isn't rural India or Africa we're talking about. America belongs to the elite group of nations, the ones that consider themselves 'developed'. Yet, what really constitutes development? When employed people need to visit charity centers for a meal, it is a sign of imminent bad times.

When unemployment and homelessness is affecting such countries, I shudder to think about the situation in India. Here, our politicians unlawfully obtain MHADA flats, which are meant for the economically backward. They relentlessly siphon public money. They're public servants but amass wealth like medieval kings. To what extent will we bear the tyranny of such politicians? We are a democracy. Yet, we behave like we are under the dictatorship of these morally-deprived, power-hungry babus. There might be many honest politicians out there, but they're helpless since the majority are sick.

It's up to us - the younger generation - to really make a difference. We need to get together and demand cleaner politicians, better governance and stricter laws. After all, India is ours. And if not us, then who? And if not now, then when?

Sleep

SOme sleep to refresh,

Some sleep to revive,

Some sleep out of stress,

Some sleep to feel alive


I sleep to connect with the force within,

I sleep to energise my soul,

I sleep for peace, it doesn't matter when

I sleep to fill the empty hole


Why can't my sleep be just mine,

Where No one decides how much I need,

In my slumber, why do I whine?

To my lack of sleep, who pays heed?


I wish to escape this curse on my bed,

Everyone's after my sleep,

When I sleep less, my eyes get red

But who cares if in despair I weep!


Goodbye sleep, I'll miss you my love

Until we unite again, at death time,

I'll see you someday at the heavens above,

Where no one bothers us - you'll be all mine!

Demystifying Me!

Honesty is a virtue, some may say,

Diplomacy is better, others scream,

Neither works, whichever way,

Under the garb of 'self-esteem'.


Self-loving they say, is arrogant living,

Berating yourself is being 'humble',

Even if you're a person of selfless giving,

If you love yourself, 'he's egoistic' they mumble!


But it all works out perfectly in the end,

The creator's love sets you free,

Society's rules, I'd rather bend,

The unseen love fills me with glee


Love one another, forgive their quest for might,

We all are one, as the saying goes,

You'll be misunderstood when you bring the light,

Empathize, and feel the energy flow from your head to the toes.


A kingdom of heaven awaits you,

When you review the actions of your earth time,

It's not a place of sorrow, you begin anew,

Angels sing in unison, together they rhyme.

Celebrating unity

We must strive to recognize our differences,and yet celebrate our unity. We all aren't alike. Apart from being distinct physically, each person has a unique nature. Some are temperamental, some overemotional, some insensitive. Being any of these isn't necessarily wrong. It just is. But in a world that is increasingly intolerant, a slight deviation from our internal 'what's acceptable' filter is frowned upon. The first filter is looks. Why do we attach so much importance to one's physical appearance? So often we hear someone say 'She looks like a promiscuous woman'. Why? Just because she chooses to dress in a way not acceptable to us? We quickly term people as 'beautiful', 'ugly', 'too short', 'too tall', 'fat', 'skinny'...the list is endless. Our matrimonial adverts stem from such perceptions.

When we recognize that all of us are just the same, at the soul level, all our perceptions will disappear. If the 'six degrees of separation' theory is to be believed, then we're all related to one another by just six people. And even if there's no scientific basis to the theory, isn't it something nice to believe in anyway?

Love everyone, and respect and accept them for who they are...not what they look like. Look at each person as a soul who has chosen that body, whether it's obese, skinny, crippled...anything. See the beauty in every creation...and your own inner beauty will shine on the outside. And it'll be beauty that lasts. For what you judge, you will one day become.