Master your emotions

It doesn’t take much to annoy us - it could be a scathing comment masked in jest, or a seemingly harmless observation with sinister intention. Whichever it is, it doesn’t matter. What does matter however is our reaction. If you learn to act, and not re-act, then you’ve touched upon something truly special. But the tragedy is that most of us only end up reacting, never acting. Why do we blame another person for saying something to us, and give our power away? The person shot something from his mouth, and nonchalantly walked away, leaving us to endlessly ponder over the comment. Yet, why must we ponder? Why can’t we discard the comment with the similar level of insensitivity with which it was delivered? The answer is simple, really – it’s the ego. Our ego often prevents us from seeing us for who we really are, and also, from seeing others for who they really are. Mastery of emotions can never be achieved without the mastery of the ego. I’m still endeavouring to do so, and I do believe that I’ve made considerable progress. And you will too, if you gently assimilate new concepts. I emphasize gently since nothing is ever achieved by force. Nothing worthwhile, anyway. And as you apply these ideas to your daily life, and find yourself struggling, don’t sweat. And most importantly, don’t berate yourself, for you are a wonderfully perfect creation of God. Here’s a little personal insight into our most common emotion.

ANGER

Work through your anger, it’s not really so hard to do so. The next time you find yourself getting angry at something or someone, just immediately change your thought process. Think of something calming, think of the lovely things about yourself, of how many things you’re grateful for. This will be a little tough in the beginning, for the mind is inherently rebellious. It will try and force you out of such thinking and compel you to act on your anger, but just like any other machine, the mind can and does respond to training. Train your mind. Train it to think different thoughts, positive thoughts, fulfilling thoughts, grateful thoughts, anything but angry thoughts. Anger is like a virus, destroying everything that comes into its path. Don’t contain anger, for that is harmful too. Rather, work on releasing that anger. When someone does something to anger you, instantly turn your attention to your breath. Focus on breathing in, and breathing out, counting till 10. And then starting over. You will soon feel your anger subsiding, and gradually, vanishing. That’s not the only technique though. If you can’t change your thought process at the moment, or focus on your breath, just keep the anger inside, but don’t react. When you get home, find a pillow, and punch it vigorously. Keep punching it, till you feel that pent-up aggression being released. And when it’s all done, when the pillow has exploded and the feathers are strewn all over the room, calmly sit down and ask yourself ‘why did I react like that?’, ‘What’s the problem in the pattern of my consciousness that is causing such reactions?’ And then, I suggest something drastic. Forgive the person. Forgive him/her, even if it wasn’t your fault. Forgive the person for you know that you’re beyond trivial things. Forgive the person for you understand what the other person doesn’t. Forgive the person for there’s divinity within you. And most importantly, forgive the person for there’s divinity in them. When we understand that supreme divinity flows through everyone, how can we not be more forgiving? Every spiritual book, whether it’s ‘A course in miracles,’ or ‘Conversations with God’, or ‘You can heal your life’ talks about the single most act that defines your life – forgiveness. And it doesn’t cost you money or time. Yet it’s priceless, and timeless. And Louise Hay, whom I consider my idol, makes the process of forgiveness so easy that’s it hard not to do. Simply think of the person whom you want to forgive, and say aloud or mentally, ‘I forgive you for not being what I want you to be. I forgive you and set you free.’ And as Louise rightly says, this affirmation actually sets us free!

I’ve struggled with anger, intense anger, before I began my inward journey. If I didn’t have things my way, it would make me angry. If someone had things their way, and if I didn’t like that way, it would make me angry. It would take awful little to anger or irritate me, and when I look back, it was such a waste of mental energy. But I don’t regret it, any of it. For certain incidents in your life happen for a reason, and sometimes it is those apparently regretful incidents that shape your life. So never regret anything. Bless your past, see it for what it was, and move on. And don’t struggle with this new thought pattern. Your new thinking process will seamlessly bind into your consciousness. For life is meant to be easy, so stop believing otherwise.

9 comments:

wow! what an insanely powerful post! master your emotions! i have begun this journey and i am doing so well! an you are the Shiznet! well written! keep this magic coming! cause we are perfect creations of god!

 

Read thru ur blog rohan
‎​Wonderful
‎​But tell me, if one is to become inert as a human being, how meaningful is that life?
‎​If anger emanates, it should be with reason, and it should be expressed
‎​And, if one is at the receiving end of this anger, he should endeavour to help the angry soul to calm down
‎​What is the point if humans were to become so self-contained, that the need for other human beings would cease to exist?
‎​It goes against the fundamental laws of nature.

 

Thank you, Usha. Well, I do agree that anger, with or withour reason, must be expressed. And I've mentioned how one can do that.

Moreover, I'm talking about self-love. Self-containment is another thing altogether. It's important to consider yourself as part of the whole, but some level of detachment is necessary, I think.

 

wow rohan you wrote with such eloquence. beautifully written my friend :)

 

You know lads.. I've been struggling with anger for as long as I can remember now and it's only gotten worse with age.

Finally a few months back I sat down after one of many such bouts of anger, and I was just plain exhausted. Mentally. emotionally and even physically drained. I was amazed and disappointed with myself at the same time. It was exasperating to realize that I'd granted some other person so much power over me, so as to leave me feeling so spent at the end of it all.

Ever since, more unsuccessfully than successfully, I've been trying to devise a mechanism to counter my usual impulse to "lose it". I've been getting better at it.. but by fluke. And I couldn't really place a finger on what was working and what wasn't.

Your zen-inspired post was so wonderful to read through. You've helped me derive coherence from the chaos of my mind... and for that I'm truly thankful.

On a side-note, am loving seeing you go through this journey of self-discovery and self-realization over the course of time. Good things will happen for u :)

God Bless n Good Luck.

 

Hey Anne,

You've got the gist of my post so beautifully. I've known you over 8 years now, and you're one of loveliest persons to have come into my life. We don't talk much, but when we do, it has a lot of meaning.

It's amazing how we're both doing so well on this fantastic journey called life. And yes, good things will happen - to both of us. And I do hope our crazy bond remains intact. Crazy is the only word that describes it ;)

Muah!

 

Thank you, Aiza! :) Means a lot.

 

Hey Rohan,
I happened to come across this post by chance.But at the end of it I am really glad that I did. Its great to know how well you understand the underlying message of life.
Exceptionally inspirational!
Love
Vidisha

 

Thanks, Vidisha! I'm so happy that you connected with the message. Lots of love and peace always!