Master your emotions

It doesn’t take much to annoy us - it could be a scathing comment masked in jest, or a seemingly harmless observation with sinister intention. Whichever it is, it doesn’t matter. What does matter however is our reaction. If you learn to act, and not re-act, then you’ve touched upon something truly special. But the tragedy is that most of us only end up reacting, never acting. Why do we blame another person for saying something to us, and give our power away? The person shot something from his mouth, and nonchalantly walked away, leaving us to endlessly ponder over the comment. Yet, why must we ponder? Why can’t we discard the comment with the similar level of insensitivity with which it was delivered? The answer is simple, really – it’s the ego. Our ego often prevents us from seeing us for who we really are, and also, from seeing others for who they really are. Mastery of emotions can never be achieved without the mastery of the ego. I’m still endeavouring to do so, and I do believe that I’ve made considerable progress. And you will too, if you gently assimilate new concepts. I emphasize gently since nothing is ever achieved by force. Nothing worthwhile, anyway. And as you apply these ideas to your daily life, and find yourself struggling, don’t sweat. And most importantly, don’t berate yourself, for you are a wonderfully perfect creation of God. Here’s a little personal insight into our most common emotion.

ANGER

Work through your anger, it’s not really so hard to do so. The next time you find yourself getting angry at something or someone, just immediately change your thought process. Think of something calming, think of the lovely things about yourself, of how many things you’re grateful for. This will be a little tough in the beginning, for the mind is inherently rebellious. It will try and force you out of such thinking and compel you to act on your anger, but just like any other machine, the mind can and does respond to training. Train your mind. Train it to think different thoughts, positive thoughts, fulfilling thoughts, grateful thoughts, anything but angry thoughts. Anger is like a virus, destroying everything that comes into its path. Don’t contain anger, for that is harmful too. Rather, work on releasing that anger. When someone does something to anger you, instantly turn your attention to your breath. Focus on breathing in, and breathing out, counting till 10. And then starting over. You will soon feel your anger subsiding, and gradually, vanishing. That’s not the only technique though. If you can’t change your thought process at the moment, or focus on your breath, just keep the anger inside, but don’t react. When you get home, find a pillow, and punch it vigorously. Keep punching it, till you feel that pent-up aggression being released. And when it’s all done, when the pillow has exploded and the feathers are strewn all over the room, calmly sit down and ask yourself ‘why did I react like that?’, ‘What’s the problem in the pattern of my consciousness that is causing such reactions?’ And then, I suggest something drastic. Forgive the person. Forgive him/her, even if it wasn’t your fault. Forgive the person for you know that you’re beyond trivial things. Forgive the person for you understand what the other person doesn’t. Forgive the person for there’s divinity within you. And most importantly, forgive the person for there’s divinity in them. When we understand that supreme divinity flows through everyone, how can we not be more forgiving? Every spiritual book, whether it’s ‘A course in miracles,’ or ‘Conversations with God’, or ‘You can heal your life’ talks about the single most act that defines your life – forgiveness. And it doesn’t cost you money or time. Yet it’s priceless, and timeless. And Louise Hay, whom I consider my idol, makes the process of forgiveness so easy that’s it hard not to do. Simply think of the person whom you want to forgive, and say aloud or mentally, ‘I forgive you for not being what I want you to be. I forgive you and set you free.’ And as Louise rightly says, this affirmation actually sets us free!

I’ve struggled with anger, intense anger, before I began my inward journey. If I didn’t have things my way, it would make me angry. If someone had things their way, and if I didn’t like that way, it would make me angry. It would take awful little to anger or irritate me, and when I look back, it was such a waste of mental energy. But I don’t regret it, any of it. For certain incidents in your life happen for a reason, and sometimes it is those apparently regretful incidents that shape your life. So never regret anything. Bless your past, see it for what it was, and move on. And don’t struggle with this new thought pattern. Your new thinking process will seamlessly bind into your consciousness. For life is meant to be easy, so stop believing otherwise.

Are you self-centred or selfish?

It’s easy to confuse these two terms, but they are as different from each other as chalk and cheese. While ‘selfish‘ suggests blatant disregard for another, ‘self centred’ simply implies a ‘greater’ focus on the self.  Nothing wrong with the latter, everything wrong with the former!

If you love yourself, focus on your life, without delving too much into other people’s affairs, it makes you self-centred and not selfish. And being that way is, to me, the blueprint for a good life. To quote author Neale Donald Walsch in his best-selling book ‘Conversations with God’, “blessed are the self-centred for they shall know God.”

So the next time you put yourself BEFORE another and not at the COST of another, and someone calls you ‘selfish’, direct them to the nearest dictionary. Or better still, give them the link to this blog ;)

Rohan

My time will come

Birds will stop in their flight,

Trees won't sway, in the still night,

It's not far away, I needn't run,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


The inner me isn't yet known,

In my present life, I'm all alone,

What other people like, isn't my concept of fun,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


I've often lost my soul to love,

My commitment is seen by the figure above,

Yet this time I've lost, others forces have won,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


When you love another, and you feel pure,

Where love is the ailment, and also the cure,

But your emotions are tangled, like hair in a bun,

It's a matter of time, my time will come.


I'm misunderstood, from within I'm torn,

I can't love another, unless it's my clone,

In such violent chaos, I'll simply keep mum,

It's a matter of time, my time will come

The world of pornography – taking things 'lying down'?

Like almost every other bloke on the planet, I've indulged in the viewing of porn- the odd flick here and there. And admittedly, it was rather entertaining.

This might sound ludicrous, but my reason for viewing it was a tad different from many others. I always felt that the performers were attracted to each other, or at the very least, shared a level of healthy comfort. After all, making love is an art, and how can the process occur, without the involvement of abundant emotions?

My idealistic perceptions went bust when I watched a talk show recently, the topic being 'horrors of the adult film industry'. I was shocked to realize that many women are forced into the business, and girls as young as 18 are misled by promises of fame and glamour. Of course, a lot enter the industry by choice, but leaving it is often choiceless. Moreover, in some films, the kind of acts women are made to perform are positively ghastly and the ideas for such performances can only germinate in a mind that is seriously depraved. A particular film titled 'Deep throat' is regarded as an adult film classic. When one reads the story line on wikipedia , it appears that the actors would have had immense fun while shooting for it. However, many years after the movie's release, the lead actress said she was forced to perform those acts by her perverted husband and anyone who watches the film, is, in essence, seeing her get raped.

We all in our own ways support this industry. If there wasn't a demand, there wouldn't be any supply. The next time you find yourself watching an adult film or see it stored in someone's mobile phone, simply ask yourself: Does this really serve me? Am I so desperate?

Wait for the real act, whenever it comes into your life. In all probability, it'll have a great deal of love involved in it. Trust me, the feeling is much better...and cleaner.

Young India beckons us...are we listening?

It's been a while since I put up something on my blog, except for the poem on sleep - a result of my revisit to childhood.

Today, I saw a short documentary titled 'America: Down and Out'. It focussed on the increasing level of homelessness in America, a country which has long boasted of being 'the land of opportunities'. However, let alone opportunities, the land doesn't even let the homeless lay their bodies on it; instead, they are arrested for 'loitering'. And this isn't rural India or Africa we're talking about. America belongs to the elite group of nations, the ones that consider themselves 'developed'. Yet, what really constitutes development? When employed people need to visit charity centers for a meal, it is a sign of imminent bad times.

When unemployment and homelessness is affecting such countries, I shudder to think about the situation in India. Here, our politicians unlawfully obtain MHADA flats, which are meant for the economically backward. They relentlessly siphon public money. They're public servants but amass wealth like medieval kings. To what extent will we bear the tyranny of such politicians? We are a democracy. Yet, we behave like we are under the dictatorship of these morally-deprived, power-hungry babus. There might be many honest politicians out there, but they're helpless since the majority are sick.

It's up to us - the younger generation - to really make a difference. We need to get together and demand cleaner politicians, better governance and stricter laws. After all, India is ours. And if not us, then who? And if not now, then when?

Sleep

SOme sleep to refresh,

Some sleep to revive,

Some sleep out of stress,

Some sleep to feel alive


I sleep to connect with the force within,

I sleep to energise my soul,

I sleep for peace, it doesn't matter when

I sleep to fill the empty hole


Why can't my sleep be just mine,

Where No one decides how much I need,

In my slumber, why do I whine?

To my lack of sleep, who pays heed?


I wish to escape this curse on my bed,

Everyone's after my sleep,

When I sleep less, my eyes get red

But who cares if in despair I weep!


Goodbye sleep, I'll miss you my love

Until we unite again, at death time,

I'll see you someday at the heavens above,

Where no one bothers us - you'll be all mine!

Demystifying Me!

Honesty is a virtue, some may say,

Diplomacy is better, others scream,

Neither works, whichever way,

Under the garb of 'self-esteem'.


Self-loving they say, is arrogant living,

Berating yourself is being 'humble',

Even if you're a person of selfless giving,

If you love yourself, 'he's egoistic' they mumble!


But it all works out perfectly in the end,

The creator's love sets you free,

Society's rules, I'd rather bend,

The unseen love fills me with glee


Love one another, forgive their quest for might,

We all are one, as the saying goes,

You'll be misunderstood when you bring the light,

Empathize, and feel the energy flow from your head to the toes.


A kingdom of heaven awaits you,

When you review the actions of your earth time,

It's not a place of sorrow, you begin anew,

Angels sing in unison, together they rhyme.

Celebrating unity

We must strive to recognize our differences,and yet celebrate our unity. We all aren't alike. Apart from being distinct physically, each person has a unique nature. Some are temperamental, some overemotional, some insensitive. Being any of these isn't necessarily wrong. It just is. But in a world that is increasingly intolerant, a slight deviation from our internal 'what's acceptable' filter is frowned upon. The first filter is looks. Why do we attach so much importance to one's physical appearance? So often we hear someone say 'She looks like a promiscuous woman'. Why? Just because she chooses to dress in a way not acceptable to us? We quickly term people as 'beautiful', 'ugly', 'too short', 'too tall', 'fat', 'skinny'...the list is endless. Our matrimonial adverts stem from such perceptions.

When we recognize that all of us are just the same, at the soul level, all our perceptions will disappear. If the 'six degrees of separation' theory is to be believed, then we're all related to one another by just six people. And even if there's no scientific basis to the theory, isn't it something nice to believe in anyway?

Love everyone, and respect and accept them for who they are...not what they look like. Look at each person as a soul who has chosen that body, whether it's obese, skinny, crippled...anything. See the beauty in every creation...and your own inner beauty will shine on the outside. And it'll be beauty that lasts. For what you judge, you will one day become.

A soul's cry

I walk through a million souls,

Yet sometimes I feel so alone,

An actor in life, I play many roles

I shriek in happiness, in despair I groan


What is the purpose of my being?

My inner voice calls out to me,

Is there a message I'm not really seeing?

My mind wants to read it, my soul is simply free


For the soul knows that there is no goal,

This drama I'm in does not reflect me,

There is no act, nor is there a role,

In the vast spiritual realm, I'm just a tiny bee


The real me resides in a place too deep.

The image in the mirror makes me vain,

In my subconscious, when I sleep,

I find the connection and lose all the pain.


As I awake and return to the grind,

Back to the world, where I laugh and weep,

In this state, I'm controlled by my mind,

My soul cries out, 'when will you sleep!'?